Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
