the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
