love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
