this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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