I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
