i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
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