He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
