It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
