just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
