last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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