I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
We're too hungover to prance.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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