Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
