Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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