dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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