She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
