i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
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