the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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