We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Don't make out with my wife yet
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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