if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
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Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
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How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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