Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize