Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
