i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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