I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
