Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
There are leaves in my underwear?
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