i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize