just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
