My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize