Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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