"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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