Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
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