She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
