great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize