The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize