Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize