You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
