I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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