theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize