you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
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