i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
