whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
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Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
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Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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