The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
