Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize