i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I'm getting married
To pizza
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