Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
we should paint friendship bongs
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