we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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