Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
My ass is underappreciated
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
