it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
