haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
It was confusing and full of hummus
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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