I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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