then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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