i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
