woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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